This blog post is a little different… I won’t be sharing my usual business tips or photography insights today. Instead, I want to share a deeply personal experience — something that shaped me years ago and something I chose to revisit again this year. It’s raw, challenging, transformative, and honestly one of the most unusual things I’ve ever done. Even as I sit here writing about it, part of me still can’t believe I willingly signed up for it again. But sometimes life nudges you back toward the things that cracked you open in the best possible way.
This February, I decided it was time to go back to a 10‑day silent meditation course. Yes… ten full days of silence, isolation, no phone, no talking, no reading, no journaling, no music, no eye contact, no distractions — just meditation, nature, and your own mind. If that sounds intense, it’s because it is. It’s not a retreat. It’s not a spa. It’s not a relaxing getaway. It’s a complete stripping away of everything familiar and comfortable so you can finally hear what’s underneath all the noise.
There’s something strangely humbling about voluntarily stepping into that kind of environment. You hand over your phone, your car keys — all the little things you normally cling to for comfort — and suddenly you’re left with nothing but yourself. No external stimulation. No escape routes. No numbing. No scrolling. No venting. No distractions to hide behind. Just you, your breath, your thoughts, and the quietest version of life you can imagine.
And that’s exactly why I went back.
What Vipassana Actually Is
If you haven’t heard of Vipassana, it’s one of India’s oldest meditation techniques, first taught 2,500 years ago by Buddha. It’s not religious, not spiritual in the “woo‑woo” sense, and not connected to any belief system. It’s a practical method of self‑awareness — a way of observing your mind and body so you can face the tensions and problems of daily life with more clarity and balance.
To learn Vipassana properly, you have to take a residential 10‑day course. You live on‑site, follow a strict schedule, and commit fully to the practice. There’s no dipping your toes in. You jump straight into the deep end.
Luckily, there’s a Vipassana center in Ontario, tucked away in the woods, not too far from the city. It’s quiet, secluded, and designed to remove every possible distraction so you can focus inward.
My First Time: 2015 — The Year Everything Shifted
I first learned about this center many years ago, and in 2015, I finally gathered the courage to take my first course. I had no idea what I was walking into. I just knew I needed something — a reset, a break, a new way of dealing with stress.
When I told my family I’d be disappearing into the woods, giving up my phone, and taking a vow of silence for 10 full days, some of them were convinced I was joining a cult. Honestly, I can’t blame them — it does sound a little wild when you say it out loud. But I had done my research, read countless testimonials, and felt strangely drawn to the idea.
That first course was the hardest thing I had ever done. Harder than any job, any project, any emotional challenge. It was also the best thing I had ever done for myself. It changed me in ways I didn’t expect — deeply, quietly, permanently.
The Daily Life of a Temporary Monk
When you arrive, you hand over your phone and any valuables to be locked up for the duration of your stay. You’re not allowed to bring books, journals, or anything that could pull your attention outward — the whole point is to remove every possible distraction. You’re given a simple room, a bed, and a schedule that looks like something straight out of a monastery.
Every morning, they wake you up with a gong at 4:00 AM. Meditation starts at 4:30 AM. Yes, you read that correctly. Not easy for someone like me, who’s not an early morning person!
There are 10.5 hours of meditation scheduled per day. You eat a vegetarian/vegan diet — breakfast, lunch, and then only fruit and tea for “dinner.”
You’re not allowed to talk. You’re not allowed to make eye contact. You’re not allowed to exercise. You’re not allowed to write. You’re not allowed to read.
The only break you get is walking in the woods — which is absolutely stunning (especially in winter). Snow on the branches, crisp air, total silence. It feels like stepping into another world.
The idea is simple: You live like a monk for 10 days to purify your mind.
The Emotional Roller Coaster
During my first course, every single day felt like a mental roller coaster. I experienced every emotion imaginable — but amplified. Anger, frustration, boredom, sadness, joy, anxiety, peace, restlessness, gratitude. It was like someone turned the volume up on my entire emotional system.
Some days I felt like I was floating. Other days, I wanted to run away. Some days I cried. Some days I laughed internally at the absurdity of it all.
But I got through it. And when I finished, I felt like a different person — calmer, clearer, more grounded, more compassionate. It helped me deal with stress, reduced my worrying, softened my reactions, and even cured my insomnia. The biggest lesson was equanimity — the ability to remain balanced and stable no matter what’s happening around you.
Equanimous means having emotional stability and composure, particularly in times of high stress. A very useful tool for just about anyone on this planet.
The Course Is Free — Yes, Really
One of the most beautiful things about Vipassana is that it’s completely free. You don’t pay to attend. You don’t pay for food or lodging. At the end, you can choose to donate whatever you want — or nothing at all. Every teacher and server is a volunteer. The entire center runs on generosity.
In 2015, after finishing my course, I went back later that year to serve as a volunteer for four days. I felt so grateful for what I had received that I wanted to give back — not just financially, but with my time.
Fast Forward 8 Years: Why I Went Back
Eight years later, I felt the need to return. Life had gotten busy again. Stress had crept back in. Old habits resurfaced. Even though I remembered the lessons, I wasn’t practicing them. I needed a reset — a deep one.
So this February, I signed up again.
Round Two: Slightly Easier, Still Brutal
Doing it a second time was… interesting. In some ways, it was easier because I knew what to expect. In other ways, it was still brutally difficult. The silence, the schedule, the physical discomfort, the mental chatter — none of that magically disappears just because you’ve done it before.
Time feels different there. It doesn’t fly. It crawls. It stretches. It expands.
Some days felt like entire weeks.
But I stayed. I didn’t run away. And I’m proud of that.
I met other “old students” who do this once a year — some even twice a year. That’s definitely too much for me, but I admire their dedication.
What I Gained This Time
This second course gave me:
- a break from social media
- a break from constant notifications
- a break from thinking about business 24/7
- a break from the noise of everyday life
It gave me space — real, uninterrupted space — to breathe, reflect, and reset.
I left feeling lighter, calmer, and more connected to myself. I’m hoping the effects last a long time, but even if they fade, I know I can always go back again.
Would I Recommend It?
I don’t like to preach — it’s not my style. I’m not here to convince anyone to do anything or pretend that I’ve unlocked some secret formula for inner peace. I’m just sharing my experience, honestly and openly, because it had a real impact on me. And if you asked me privately, honestly, sincerely… yes, I would recommend it to everyone at least once in their life.
Not because it’s easy. Not because it’s fun. Not because it’s some magical shortcut to enlightenment.
But because it teaches you things about yourself that you simply can’t learn in the noise of everyday life. When everything familiar is stripped away — your routines, your comforts, your distractions — you start to see yourself with a clarity that’s almost impossible to access otherwise. You notice your patterns. You notice your reactions. You notice the stories you tell yourself. And you begin to understand how much of your suffering comes from within, not from the outside world.
It strips away the noise. It shows you your patterns. It reveals your mind. It strengthens your resilience. It softens your heart. It gives you tools you can use forever — tools that don’t depend on circumstances, mood, or motivation.
Vipassana is not a vacation. It’s not a retreat. It’s not a spa. It’s not a place you go to “escape” life. It’s work — deep, internal, transformative work. The kind of work that asks you to sit with yourself, face your discomfort, and observe your mind without running away. And in a world where we’re constantly overstimulated, constantly distracted, constantly pulled in a thousand directions, that kind of stillness feels almost radical.
And sometimes, that’s exactly what we need — a reset, a pause, a moment to remember who we are underneath all the noise. A reminder that peace isn’t something we find “out there,” but something we cultivate from within.
If you’re new here and want to know more about who I am beyond the camera, you can read more about me here.
